Finally, a club that we can all be a part of that isn’t just legally required to accept our request for admission—I’m looking at you Costco. The first rule of Computer Club is that you don’t talk about Computer Club. And why should you have to? You’ve got a sticker that expressly says you’re in! And if there’s anything that the American political system has taught us this election season, it’s that blindly declaring something is just as good as proof. Now that you’re in, why not declare yourself Secretary or something fancy like that? I mean, who’s going to stop you? It’s a very remote club!
Oh, God, I’m so alone.